Jesus-n-You.com - Conflict

Conflict is an inevitable fact of life and, therefore, we all periodically encounter it. Conflict occurs when two or more people disagree on an issue. As according to 2 Timothy 2: 23-24, "Don't have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels. And the Lord's servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful." Conflict may not be a bad thing; however, the key is learning how to handle it with love. If conflict is not handled appropriately, it can lead to broken relationships or may even escalate to bigger problems.

1. What is conflict?

a. It is a miscommunication, clash, or personality difference between two or more people.

b. It can teach and mature you spiritually.

c. It is inevitable. So, how you respond is key.

d. It is the difference of opinions, ideas, or interest between two people or more people.

e. All of the above.

Correct Answer

2. During an altercation, I never ask the Holy Spirit to convict me before I speak out of turn or overreact in an inappropriate manner.

True

False

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3. Dear God, I demand that strife between and I end.

4. Who is responsible for my failure to guard what comes out of my mouth or for my ability to maintain a quiet spirit during a conflict?

a. The person with whom I have a conflict is responsible.

b. I am responsible.

c. God is responsible.

Correct Answer

5. Bitterness and resentment has taken root causing me not to forgive .

True

False

Job 36:13 (NIV): "The godless in heart harbor resentment; even when he fetters them, they do not cry for help." How to Resolve Conflict: Walk in love and immediately forgive the person with whom you have a conflict.

6. When the conflict first occur, I try to defend myself.

True

False

Proverbs 15:1 (NIV): A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. How to Resolve Conflict: Wait a minute and think before you speak out of turn! Do not defend yourself unless led by God, and then out of love allow the other person to speak first.

7. I haven't asked the Holy Spirit if I am at fault for causing the conflict.

True

False

James 3:2(NIV): "We all stumble in many ways. If anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to keep his whole body in check." How to Resolve Conflict: Pray and immediately ask God if you are at fault in the situation.

8. I know there is a problem between and I, but I pretend nothing is wrong or I deny a problem exists.

True

False

Genesis 4:9-10 (NIV):Then the LORD said to Cain, "Where is your brother Abel?" "I don't know," he replied. "Am I my brother's keeper?"The LORD said, "What have you done? Listen! Your brother's blood cries out to me from the ground. How to Resolve Conflict: If you pretend or deny that problems exist, you are wrong. Act immediately to resolve your problem(s)!

9. I plan to resolve our differences by having a discussion with the person whom I have a conflict.

True

False

Matthew 18:15-18 (NIV): "If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.' If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector. How to Resolve Conflict (others are at fault): 1. As God directs you; go whenever the other person is willing to listen. Allow the other person to speak first. When you speak, speak in love. Do not speak based on your hurt or in anger, pride, frustration, stubbornness, and fear. Never be hot-tempered. 2. Explain what hurts you and how it hurts you. 3. Ask for the changes you would like to see happen. How to Resolve Conflict (you are at fault):Immediately apologize if you are wrong and then ask for forgiveness.

10. I have forgiven the person(s) responsible for the conflict.

True

False

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11. I can never go wrong when conflict occurs if I:

a. guard what I say.

b. view conflict as coming from God and react to please Him.

c. walk in love.

d. All of the above.

Correct Answer

12. I have prayed and asked God to show me His purpose for allowing the conflict to occur.

True

False

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Directions for the Conflict Contract: I have read the twelve questions above, and I feel I am ready to start resolving my conflicts. Click here to get the Conflict Contract.

Directions for the I'm at Fault Contract: I have read the twelve questions above. I am the person at fault and I have offended others.Click here to get the I'm at Fault Contract